This is like when the customer loudly proclaims they can get the item cheaper somewhere else, and just stare at you like a cow in a field when you say they should go there then
I’ve always tried to estimate more time than I think a task will take unless I know it’s only like a simple task.
If I think it will take a few hours, I estimate a day. A day or so is 3. 3 or more becomes a week.
I’ve ran into way to many tasks somone else blindly put at a day and when we start to work the ticket we descover a ton of complications. I’ve seen so many 1-3 point tickets I’ve seen take multiple weeks because nobody thought about how deep the rabbit hole could go.
I also really like when they ask for an estimate on brand-new tech. How much time? I really, truly don’t know, because I’ve literally never worked with it in my life, nor anybody at the company. It could take 2 days or 2 weeks. Let’s just say I’ll tell you when I’m finished.
Ideally, tell them it will take 3 times your estimate and do it in 2 times your estimate. You’ll either look fast or correct.
Always multiply your estimates by a factor of 4, so you can gain a reputation as a miracle worker
That’s a rookie move. 2 hours can easily turn into 8 hours. If that happens, you still have to work on other things too. For a two hour task estimate a week. Two weeks to test and fix it when it breaks.
Heard from management: We need more accurate estimates.
I think they forgot what estimate means.
Engineers: We need more accurate SOWs and less feature creep.
Management: Please add this other feature in the same time period
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Never give firm estimates. It’s done when it’s done. Feel free to check in.
Customers kinda want to know in advance if a task will take 2 hours or 200 hours in advance
“adding a button to the front page? Yeah, it will definitively take less than 6 months to make. No promises though.”
The button must identity if there’s pigeon in the picture
Spitball. Keep’em posted. Be honest.
But nothing firm.
As someone who has been doing this for two decades, I disagree. Give a firm estimate, and always deliver before you said you would, just make sure you pad the fuck out of that estimate so that it would be virtually impossible not to accomplish it.
Is there a joke in the comic anywhere? This is just an average morning in consulting.
My favorite is when project managers try to tell you it will be easier with more people.
For some things that’s true.
But for some, it really just takes a while.
I tried to explain to a PM that maybe we should ask his wife next time if she can split up her pregnancy between two women. Baby could be born in half the time.
He didn’t appreciate my feedback and wrote me up for it. Probably my proudest moment.
The Ringelmann effect is the tendency for individual members of a group to become increasingly less productive as the size of their group increases
“why don’t you listen to what you just said in your head, and let’s start this conversation over from before going into it with the wrong attitude” is a more polite version of “the fuck did you just say? Start over and drop the bullshit at the door.”
And I wholeheartedly recommend using it if the occasion pops up. It’s not rude, not confrontational, allows the person who said the dumb thing to hopefully realize their mistake and brush it off without being directly called on it. Any supervisor that is worth working for won’t bring it up again.
