• VikingHippie
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    6 months ago

    Yeah, I’ve always thought of it that way too: abhor the underpaying bosses and the politicians who allow it and advocate for change, but until then keep tipping generously no matter the level of service.

    If you get bad service, your server might be having a rough day and/or the place might be busy or otherwise make their job of serving you more difficult. That doesn’t mean that you have a right to deny them rent and food money.

    • Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      Pretty much where I’m at. Not going to protest a shitty system by taking it out on a waiter, but will vote to abolish the whole thing and put the burden on the employer where it should be.

      That doesn’t mean that you have a right to deny them rent and food money.

      That’s the insane part - you do have the right to deny them rent or for food money. You shouldn’t, but under the tipping model you absolutely do.

      • VikingHippie
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        6 months ago

        I mean yeah, you LEGALLY have the right, I meant that you morally and ethically absolutely don’t.

        • Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          Which is why I’m opposed to tipping as a system. It’s predatory. It transfers a moral responsibility to customers that should be on the employer, which provides the foundation for guilt-based social engineering targeting the customer, and a reliance of the employee on the success of that social engineering - the alternative being not getting paid because some asshole didn’t think you refilled his drink fast enough.

          Imagine if a hospital or something was run like that. Your insurance covered the doctors’ and admins’ pay, but the nurses, techs, and support staff all just rely on tips! *shoves an iPad with a credit card reader onto your lap*

          It’s insane that that model is legal for any business.

        • JCreazy@midwest.social
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          6 months ago

          I beg to differ. I think morally an ethically not letting society dictate. What you do with your own money is the correct stance. If you go to your job and you get paid that is your money and you should absolutely under no circumstances be obligated to tip because society has made you think that they need it to live. That’s your money that you need to live it’s absolutely ridiculous that people make statements trying to guilt trip you into thinking that you owe it to someone else to give your hard-earned money to them because their employer decides not to do it. Screw that. And no I’m not saying don’t tip, what I’m saying is don’t support businesses that expect you to pay their employees wages. I significantly cut down eating at restaurants because I don’t think that I should be obligated to pay employees wages, especially with the ridiculous prices. The restaurants charge for food nowadays. I absolutely hate the narrative of people guilt tripping other people because they choose not to tip. That is their obligation in right and they should absolutely not feel bad about it whatsoever.

          • VikingHippie
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            6 months ago

            morally an ethically not letting society dictate. What you do with your own money is the correct stance

            Eww, sounds like some anti-tax libertarian filth 🤢

            it’s absolutely ridiculous that people make statements trying to guilt trip you into thinking that you owe it to someone else to give your hard-earned money to them because their employer decides not to do it.

            Answered your own rhetorical question. If the employer was forced to pay them a living wage (or did so voluntarily, but that’s as rare as an ethical bank), you wouldn’t need to tip, but until then, you’re gonna have to pay so that the person who just performed a service for you doesn’t go hungry or homeless.

            And no I’m not saying don’t tip

            Could have fooled me!

            what I’m saying is don’t support businesses that expect you to pay their employees wages.

            You should have led with that, then, rather than sounding like a deranged libertarian (but I repeat myself) for the first half of your reply

            what I’m saying is don’t support businesses that expect you to pay their employees wages.

            I agree in principle, but in reality they’re as like a politician that doesn’t accept any form of bribes: extremely rare and in many areas they don’t exist at all

            I significantly cut down eating at restaurants

            Good for you, but if everyone did that, servers would all get fired rather than just underpaid.

            absolutely hate the narrative of people guilt tripping other people because they choose not to tip. That is their obligation in right and they should absolutely not feel bad about it whatsoever.

            Aaand we’re back to the libertarian tantrum of focusing on “-I- shouldn’t have to” rather than “their bosses should have to” 🙄

            • JCreazy@midwest.social
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              6 months ago

              So I’m going to be really honest with you. I have no idea what a libertarian is so I liked it up. I don’t know if I would consider myself a libertarian but after reading about it I don’t really see what’s bad about it. Can you explain to me in your own words why you think it’s bad? I genuinely would like to hear your opinion about it.

              • VikingHippie
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                6 months ago

                The definition of libertarian I was referring to is the American right wing libertarian.

                Basically it’s a childishly selfish belief that you owe nothing to the society that supports you and everything would be better if people were left alone to neglect and abuse each other.

                That’s an unfair exaggeration, of course, but not by much. It’s basically rebranded anarcho-capitalism and idealised selfishness disguised in rhetoric about liberty and self-determination.

                If you’re going to be part of society, you should pay your part and if not, you should watch out for bears.

                • JCreazy@midwest.social
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                  6 months ago

                  Ok well with that definition I would no. I’m nowhere close to those ideals. I don’t think that people deserve things for free. I also believe that everyone should contribute to society because that’s how a society is ran. With that being said though I also am a firm believer that people should be able to do whatever they want as long as it doesn’t affect others. Maybe I should reword I’m saying. What I’m saying is as a customer I should not be expected to tip as in pay the restaurants, employees or whatever. And because this is expected of me, I do not go to restaurants and I encourage others to do the same. I’m saying that this is not how things should be.

                  • VikingHippie
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                    6 months ago

                    I don’t think that people deserve things for free

                    First, your server isn’t getting anything for free, they’re working for their wage and tips.

                    Second, when it comes to the absolute basics necessary to survive then yes, people who could not otherwise afford to live should ABSOLUTELY get things for free.

                    people should be able to do whatever they want as long as it doesn’t affect others

                    Stiffing your server DOES affect others, though.

                    as a customer I should not be expected to tip as in pay the restaurants, employees or whatever

                    True, but right now it’s the least bad alternative to starving and homeless servers.

                    I do not go to restaurants and I encourage others to do the same

                    Which is even worse for the servers since fewer customers means fewer tips and may eventually mean getting fired.

                    You’re basically taking food out of the mouths of those who (used to) serve you and their children.

            • Cosmic Cleric@lemmy.world
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              6 months ago

              You’re not being fair in how you judge his comments, instead you’re judging them a certain way that fits your narrative.

      • Cosmic Cleric@lemmy.world
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        6 months ago

        Not going to protest a shitty system by taking it out on a waiter, but will vote to abolish the whole thing and put the burden on the employer where it should be.

        That vote / change will never happen if you don’t push back on tipping, that’s just the human nature of the situation.

    • AA5B@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      You’re assuming you owe the server rent and food money. Where are you the employer? How does that server deserve special benefits over the person at the drive through, the busser, the stocker at the grocery, etc? You’re an enabler, keeping an abusive system alive to benefit one small category at the expense of everyone else

      Granted, I tip generously as well, but that’s because I’m a pussy who doesn’t stand behind my beliefs

      • Cosmic Cleric@lemmy.world
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        6 months ago

        but that’s because I’m a pussy who doesn’t stand behind my beliefs

        Hey, at least you’re honest about it. :)

      • VikingHippie
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        6 months ago

        The cost of paying those people at the very least minimum wage is factored into the price of your purchase, except for the busser, who shares tips with the servers.

        Because that’s not the case with servers, you tip in order for the server to get paid for performing a service for you.

        You’re an enabler, keeping an abusive system alive to benefit one small category at the expense of everyone else

        No. I’ve been clear from the start that tipping is a thing we have to do temporarily so that servers don’t starve or become homeless before we finally fix the system.

        • AA5B@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          Maybe the only way to finally fix the system is to stop tipping, so servers will go elsewhere until pay comes up. Normally I disagree with this line of thinking because it’s not easy to change careers, but serving is usually a “job” not a career. If we’re worried about minimum wage, I claim that many minimum wage jobs are easier to switch among. If a job requires special skills and knowledge, it deserves pay as such.

          • VikingHippie
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            6 months ago

            Maybe the only way to finally fix the system is to stop tipping

            No. The livelihood of servers is not an acceptable sacrifice to help servers. Defeats the point completely and there’s no guarantee that it’ll work.

            so servers will go elsewhere until pay comes up

            Go where? It’s not like they all live in areas that have even a single place that pays servers a living wage or can afford to mo.

            serving is usually a “job” not a career.

            To paraphrase Matthew Perry (RIP): could you BE anymore condescending towards people with a career in the service industry?

            I claim that many minimum wage jobs are easier to switch among

            And you’d be wrong. People work minimum wage because it was the least bad job available. Unless you’re part of a union, employers have all the power and afford none to workers.

            If a job requires special skills and knowledge, it deserves pay as such.

            Every job does. There’s no such thing as unskilled labor.

    • Cosmic Cleric@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      That doesn’t mean that you have a right to deny them rent and food money.

      Their bosses and/or their lack of wherewithal in obtaining a job that pays enough to meet their standard of living is responsible, not the customer of the company.