• Kedly@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    Since I have been a child the word retard has NOT been used for people with developmental disabilities, it has only ever been used to describe people who’ve done something incredibly stupid that they had the capacity not to do. In fact, I have worked with low and high functioning people with developmental disabilities, and one of the high function people actually told me to use the word when he’s being stupid, as I was using the word goof before, and that had unfortunate prison meanings that the resident didnt like.

    • Stumblinbear@pawb.social
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      1 year ago

      My roommate is autistic and was in the special classes. He thinks it’s funny to be called a retard when he’s, you know, being retarded. He actively tells me not to stop doing it. Hell, he’s the one who told me it was fine to begin with, haha

      • Krauerking@lemy.lol
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        1 year ago

        Hey! It doesn’t matter if people say they are ok with it! White people are fixing the world by doing nothing but creating limitations to how we speak! Can’t you understand how that’s better?
        Look at Latin-x and how it isn’t usable by anyone that actually speaks Spanish and was entirely conceived of by rich kids in universities in America! It’s just obviously better when we let others define our entire interactions with the world and immediately get upset to try to shame anyone not conforming to the point that shame isn’t even usable because no one feels it anymore.

        This is better this way. ¯⁠\⁠_⁠ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ⁠_⁠/⁠¯

      • Kedly@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        Yes, so thats 33 years where its NOT BEEN USED TO REFER TO PEOPLE WITH DEVELOPMENTMENTAL DISABILITIES

        • GalacticCmdr@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          It absolutely was used to refer to development disabilities in the US during the 80s - as well as anyone acting like they were disabled.

        • Frog-Brawler@kbin.social
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          1 year ago

          And probably about 23 years where it’s been frowned on to use the word as a pejorative. Don’t use your capital letters with me dipshit.

          • Kedly@lemm.ee
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            1 year ago

            I can capitalise whatever letters I damn well please, and like I said in another reply, insults by their nature have never been appropriate, and by their very nature are frowned upon.

              • Kedly@lemm.ee
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                1 year ago

                Yes, yes I am. What a fucking gotcha that was. Oh no, my insult insulted people, whatever should I do

                  • Kedly@lemm.ee
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                    1 year ago

                    In this instance being a cunt to the idiots was my exact point. I dont care for their stupid ass opinions, and I dont for yours. IRL I make it a point to avoid people as sensitive as you as its more rewarding to spend my time around people who arent as fragile and sensitive

                  • slackassassin@sh.itjust.works
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                    1 year ago

                    You know, not too long ago the same argument you’re making was made for the word cunt with regard to sexism instead of ableism. Just food for thought is all.

      • Stumblinbear@pawb.social
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        1 year ago

        God I fucking hate “it’s current year stop doing x”

        The year isn’t a fucking argument, dipshit retard

        • Frog-Brawler@kbin.social
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          1 year ago

          It’s generally intended to mean “pull your head out of your ass, what was once acceptable is no longer.”

          Glad I was able to spell that out for you.

      • Kedly@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        Nah man, I’m just not down for constantly keeping up to date with the treadmill of what words are and arent appropriate… especially for insults, which have never been meant to be appropriate. I dont fucking care if your feelings are so fragile that relatively tame words can hurt you

        • be_excellent_to_each_other@kbin.social
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          1 year ago

          Then that’s a more honest response than your earlier one. It’s not that you don’t understand that others may be hurt by your language even though it’s not a word you personally ever used to describe developmental disabilities, it’s just that you don’t give a shit.

          Good on you for owning it (on the second try), I guess.

          I dont fucking care if your feelings are so fragile that relatively tame words can hurt you

          You mean like developmentally disabled people you work with who may have good reasons to be sensitive about certain words? I guess since one of those people said he was cool with it he speaks for all of them. I’m sure none of them have ever been hurt by hateful people using the R word about them.

          Nah man, I’m just not down for constantly keeping up to date with the treadmill of what words are and arent appropriate… especially for insults

          50+ years old and in my entire life this isn’t something I’ve found to be mentally taxing to keep up with. This is truly the flimsiest excuse I’ve ever seen for using shitty language. Just stick with “I don’t fucking care.”

          • Kedly@lemm.ee
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            1 year ago

            Do you really not know that people can have multiple different reasons and motivations for their behaviours and actions? I’ve been honest this entire time, there are slurs I absolutely wont use because of their history and the immediate harm they cause, but retard isnt one of them, so my earlier explaination still stands. Its also true that people that get offended on others behalf annoy me and I dont care when I offend them. If I PERSONALLY offend someone for something that they PERSONALLY struggle with? I care in that scenario and I mark it down mentally to adapt to their needs and not hurt them again. You are a stranger on the internet, I dont care about you, I dont have the emotional space to. I didnt casually use the spicy word, I used it specifically as an insult towards people who I’ve been dealing with dogshit takes from. To be clear, I NEVER called any of my clients Retard, and this client I only did for them, after they requested it, and even then it made me uncomfortable because using that word to refer to someone with developmental disabilities IS gross. Nuance exists. And yes, I’m tired of the treadmill. I have Aspergers syndrome and now the treadmill is trying to tell me that not only did the DSM take that diagnosis away, I’m now not allowed to refer to my high functioning autism as Aspergers since the guy whom it was named after was a nazi, even though my autism has NEVER BEEN about that guy, and IM THE PERSON WHO HAS the diagnosis.

        • Neato@kbin.social
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          1 year ago

          I’m just not down for constantly keeping up to date with the treadmill of what words are and arent appropriate

          Then be prepared for people to rightly call you a bigot. Sorry you’re done learning, grandpa but the world keeps turning.

          And the fact that you now know better and still choose to hurt ableist language just means you’re embracing your bigotry.

          • Stumblinbear@pawb.social
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            1 year ago

            Calling someone a bigot based entirely on the words they use instead of the intent behind them is a great way to be wrong 80% of the time

            • Neato@kbin.social
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              1 year ago

              Someone knowing using hurtful, bigoted language and claiming they didn’t “mean it like that” is asinine and disingenuous. Using deliberately incorrect terminology nearly everyone will misinterpret and then complaining when they do is placing yourself upon a cross. It’s a pathetic level of discourse usually outgrown by middle school.

              • Stumblinbear@pawb.social
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                1 year ago

                You’re assuming barely anyone keeps up with what the minority of people decide isn’t okay to say anymore. Twitter isn’t the world. Lemmy isn’t the world. Reddit isn’t the world. There may be millions of users, but the average person doesn’t give a shit about any of these platforms.

                • Neato@kbin.social
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                  1 year ago

                  If you think ableist pejoratives targeting neurodivergences and metal impairments are only present on social media, you need to touch some fucking grass. That shit hasn’t been OK in decades. South Park even did an apologetic episode on it more than a decade ago which means the discussion was mainstream. And you should 100% not be taking social cues from that show.

    • hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      1 year ago

      No matter what it meant when you were a kid, it is still an ableist slur. Also if you aren’t neurodivergent, then please just shut up.

      • Kedly@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        I fucking am and its ablist of you to assume I’m not. Get bent white knight