I just entered a text message chat from the group of students of my course, and after talking a there over some days with a sophomore (most of the chat was just me interacting) someone said “wow, the freshmen are really getting acquainted, writing shit and what else”. That was so out pocket, closed the app and now I am ranting here, is this still kind of behavior normal in your uni/country? Its so bizarre, the guy was just sophomore. EDIT: thanks everyone for the replies, I appreciate them, I think there’s some grow on my part to be done, because this seems to be way more common than I think. Welp, kinda of a bummer anyway.

  • Scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.techEnglish
    62·
    14 hours ago

    Best thing to do for things like that is let them just roll off. Either don’t respond and engage, or simply reply something like “Uh, yup, I guess so, why?” Make them explain it without asking them to explain it. It would for sure go something like:

    You: “Yeah I guess so, why?”

    Oh I just think it’s funny that freshman just are so excited to take part

    You: “I am excited to take part, is that funny?” or “I am excited to take part, this is my favorite subject” - Make them feel guilty for trying to call you out.

    Now all of a sudden they’re the ones called out, and you didn’t even do it. Shuts that shit down real quick. Note that you didn’t defend yourself, you didn’t get defensive, you didn’t even play into their “joke”. So what if you’re excited! If you’re in America you’re paying 10s of thousands of dollars to be there, why be apathetic about it. Then cross your fingers that someone else says “Me too!” and the jerk just quietly fades away.

    That sort of interaction will all of a sudden make them obviously a jerk for saying it, and they’ll try to backtrack or something but you’ll just play it off like it’s nothing, and move on. Meanwhile everyone else will be thinking “Wow they were an asshole for saying that” to you.

    • LazyingHarderThanEver@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
      2·
      13 hours ago

      I replied with “well, its just me I suppose”, but I guess misplayed “one year older lol”, anyway, thanks! I will just think it was some sort of shitpost and move on and just not talk there if its not necessary. I feel like a snowflake for being bothered by this lol

      • Scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.techEnglish
        2·
        13 hours ago

        Eh it bothers us too, but as you go through college you’ll realize more and more that unlike grade school you don’t need to care about other people’s opinions. That person is just a dick and make it very obvious, so you know you don’t want to spend time with them. Vs high school where you’re more or less forced into close quarters with them daily.

        I think that’s one of those skills that we adults just pick up slowly, not giving a shit. I remember being your age and being the same way, I was personally very emotional and took things very personally. As I grew up I guess I just learned with experience to not care. It’s a skill we all kind of learn, it’s just not very fun learning it.