CHARLESTON, SC—In what was originally intended as a “low-key girls weekend,” four of bride-to-be Julia Rose Atkinson’s closest friends were financially ruined this week after her bachelorette party completely bankrupted her fave girlies. “The weekend turned out a bit more expensive than we had anticipated, but of course it was all worth it to celebrate […]

At press time, the destitute bridesmaids had reportedly made appointments to sell their plasma in order to afford the $600 floor-length sage green gowns required for Atkinson’s wedding ceremony.