It’s got a rhyming system but I can’t for the life of me figure out the meter.

Nah, just read into it a little and then forgot it afterwards! The first link – the old Reddit thread – was quite helpful.

Graydon Carter’s background on the hand size joke is always hilarious to me. Excerpt, trimmed to be fair to the Vanity Fair post:

I took to referring to him as a “short-fingered vulgarian” in the pages of Spy magazine. … To this day, I receive the occasional envelope from Trump. There is always a photo of him … On all of them he has circled his hand in gold Sharpie … The most recent offering arrived earlier this year … this one included a circled hand and the words, “See, not so short!” I sent the picture back by return mail with a note attached, saying, “Actually, quite short.” Which I can only assume gave him fits.

I was interested in whether this was accurate. I got a similar answer, but I know almost nothing about nuclear fission and math is not my strong suit. Here it is anyway:

The heat capacity of water is fairly linear. At normal atmospheric pressure, it’s 4,200J/kg°C, which means a 300ml mug of water would take 1,260 joules to raise by 1°C and thus 75,600 joules to raise by 60°C.

Fission of a single atomic nucleus of U-235 releases an average of 3.2e-11 joules (0.000000000032). To release 75,600 joules would presumably take fission of 2.3625e+15 atoms (2,362,500,000,000,000 – two quadrillion three hundred sixty-two trillion five hundred billion).

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The longer you look, the more ridiculous the names are. “Ohio”, what the hell kind of name is that?

The Trankish/Fitretion shore is nice, I guess, but when you live nearer the Canadian border and end up vacationing in Mesfate, you look forward to going back to school.

What do you do if it comes up positive? Presumably if you know it’s a risk, you’d leave your phone in airplane mode or at home, and if you know it’s happening you’ve already been recorded?

No, but he thinks another soldier did. It’s a bit of a grim tale (though that page doesn’t cite its sources, so take this with a grain of salt):

the kitten was one of two who were orphaned after a soldier shot their mother for “yeowling”. The marine who adopted the other kitten killed it after rolling over on it in his sleep.

But Praytor’s kitten survived. He fed her on meat from ration cans. After Praytor left her to return home, she became something of a mascot for the company’s public information office. Praytor believed another marine, corporal Conrad Fisher, eventually adopted her and brought her home to the United States.

Edit: this history enthusiast’s page corroborates the story with a citation of Frank D. Praytor, “The Commandant and the Cat,” The Greybeards 23, no. 3 (May-June 2009): 30-31, 65

Indeed, the coins are broken off the resulting “coin tree” and then cleaned up by filing. The edges and details stand proud. Searching for “ban liang mold” will show other similar Chinese molds.

Oh, I was kidding just to sound like I had an explanation and then throw the orange in as an afterthought. It does look like a reference, though.

If you’re running a place like this, you’re likely to want to reduce your liability risk as much as possible, I imagine. Doubly so in as litigious a country as the USA.

It’s a visual reference to Girl with a Pearl Earring by Vermeer, with the addition of an orange.

You don’t think it might be an F7A?

Yeah, DDG have a pretty good reputation for privacy and reliability, although there have been small controversies in the past. They mainly use Bing, plus their own crawler and direct data sources where applicable.

Brave’s not the only search engine to do this, but it’s just one of a million reasons not to use Brave. They’re a scummy company. From this Reddit post:

In 2016, Brave promised to remove banner ads from websites and replace them with their own, basically trying to extract money directly from websites without the consent of their owners

In the same year, CEO Brendan Eich unilaterally added a fringe, pay-to-win Wikipedia clone into the default search engine list.

In 2018, Tom Scott and other creators noticed Brave was soliciting donations in their names without their knowledge or consent.

In 2020, Brave got caught injecting URLs with affiliate codes when users tried browsing to various websites.

Also in 2020, they silently started injecting ads into their home page backgrounds, pocketing the revenue. There was a lot of pushback: “the sponsored backgrounds give a bad first impression.”

In 2021, Brave’s TOR window was found leaking DNS queries, and a patch was only widely deployed after articles called them out.

In 2022, Brave floated the idea of further discouraging users from disabling sponsored messages.

In 2023, Brave got caught installing a paid VPN service on users’ computers without their consent.

Also in 2023, Brave got caught scraping and reselling people’s data with their custom web crawler, which was designed specifically not to announce itself to website owners.

In 2024, Brave gave up on providing advanced fingerprint protection, citing flawed statistics (people who would enable the protection would likely disable Brave telemetry).

In 2025, Brave staff publish an article endorsing PrivacyTests and say they “work with legitimate testing sites” like them. This article fails to disclose PrivacyTests is run by a Brave Senior Architect.

I’m confused, what was the injury? Did you launch the rock into the air and it came straight back down?

Funnily enough, the photo they’ve chosen to run alongside the article is of the aftermath of a suspected Russian-funded sabotage of an munition depot in Kalynivka, Ukraine, on September 27th 2017.

Great question! What got you thinking about the animal you'd like to be?

So they also have to imitate his illiterate misuse of title case for Important Words, random quotation marks for “emphasis”, and littering of SHOUTY WORDS, not to mention his bizarre self-aggrandized tone and his ridiculous ways of ending messages that he thinks makes them look more important? Thank you for your attention to this matter.