I can’t use them because I can’t convince anybody to switch with me. I talk to most people on discord and I’d rather move to using Matrix, but I can’t convince any of my friends or family or anyone I know to use anything else.

  • rumba@lemmy.zip
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    20 hours ago

    Tell them the reason they keep getting creepy ads for stuff they’re talking about in the car is FB messenger.

    That creeps enough people out.

  • sebb@lemmy.ml
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    2 days ago

    “I could add you to our group chat. Do you have Signal?” Just that. No questions asked. No convincing to anything. Either “Yes” or “Let me just download”. Surprised honestly how many people either have it already or at least know it. Obviously might not work if you ever talk to the person 1-1, but starting a group chat only takes 2 people 😉

  • chappedafloat
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    2 days ago

    If they don’t want to use private communication then just leave it. If you want privacy you have to get used to having a less social life, at least online. That’s the key really, if you want a social life, you have to start going offline, out into the real world and meet people. Get to know your neighborhood a bit or join some outdoor activity or club or something. I know it’s weird at first about going outside because we’re all basement computer nerds but you will find freedom without all the online surveillance when you leave your home.

    JK, because next challenge is to convince everyone you meet that they should leave their phones are home and if you thought getting people to use Signal is hard you have no idea because that’s just step 1.

  • Don_alForno@feddit.org
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    2 days ago

    Become unavailable on non-private messengers. Explain your reasons if asked, but stay stubborn. (And yes, it will turn out that a subset of people you know don’t give a shit about staying in contact with you.)

  • ByteMe@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    I think there is always someone who is more willing to try it, so you start from them. Like a a techy friend or a parent who doesn’t really care as long as they talk to their child. Then you can proceed by complaining to your social circle about the bad quality of the apps you currently use (like messenger). Someone will be convinced eventually. I recommend you go with signal though since element (x) apps are still not ready for commercial every day use.

  • Bronzie@sh.itjust.works
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    2 days ago

    Nope. I’ve given up trying to nudge people in, what we deam, the «right» direction.

    If they don’t see any problem in giving away their privacy for convenience, then that’s their prerogative.
    Hell, I am still unable to de-google completely myself.

    Considering setting up a Matrix server for when Discord goes full entshitification. Maybe some will join then.

  • mmhmm@lemmy.ml
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    2 days ago

    Putting up a synapse server in the public cloud and building bridges to the apps people use. At least I get my messaging in one place

  • m_f@midwest.social
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    3 days ago

    I bought everyone in my family a drink to get them to use Signal. Worked great and we’re still on it.

    Don’t bother trying to sell people on privacy etc, for the most part. Show them Giphy integration, stickers, Stories, etc and show them that it’s fun. Signal has done great work there, in making it “noob-friendly”

  • dingdongitsabear@lemmy.ml
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    3 days ago

    I’m running several opensource alternatives for clients (rocketchat, prosody, matrix) and I’ve transitioned privately from telegram and XMPP to matrix. the pushback from users is immense, they find every possible reason and excuse to stick with the messengers they’re used to and use “the new stuff” for the bare minimum.

    privately it’s easy easier, that’s the only way you can get ahold of me, so if you need/want me, that’s where I am at. for a short while tried to make it work with signal, but a) the phone number thing is a deal breaker (usernames get me only halfway there) and b) I switch and use multiple devices often and that thing is downright hostile towards people who own/use > 2 devices.

    bear in mind, I’m in a dictatorial position. they have to do what I say and even with that, it’s an uphill battle. it doesn’t help that the stuff they’re now forced to use has subpar to downright dogshit UX.

    the new, shiny, superawesome, superfast element x… is crap. I thought Signal was crap - this is another level. I don’t mean for me, it’s crap from the point of casual users, they are coming from the super polished world of telegram and imessage and twitter and friends and everything about this is off-putting. a lot of them need help setting this up, especially if it’s a multi-device scenario.

    the immediate future looks bleak and I don’t see an important development on the horizon that would change any of this. but, that’s how telegram spread, early adopters switching to it and promoting it and dragging normies along. let’s hope for a repeat.

  • Deckweiss@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    I just told everybody that I only reply on Threema and don’t use anything else.

    My thought process was - if they can’t be arsed to use another app (which is an extremely effortless task to do) then they are probably not worth staying in contact with.

    The 3 people that were most important in my life at that point got the app immediately.

    After over a decade with threema I now have over 40 contacts there, mostly friends, some colleagues, multiple hobby centric groups etc.

    I guess just start and don’t compromise and be patient

    • shortwavesurfer@lemmy.zip
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      3 days ago

      This is pretty much exactly what I did. I said I will be using signal, and if you want to stay in contact with me, that’s how you will do it, because I will not reply to anything else.

    • akilou@sh.itjust.works
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      3 days ago

      I just told everybody that I only reply on Threema

      if they can’t be arsed to use another app (which is an extremely effortless task to do) then they are probably not worth staying in contact with

      So if someone said you have to use their messagee of choice - Signal, Whatsapp, Matrix, FB Messager, Discord - you’d have no problem meeting them there because it’s effortless, yeah?

      • Deckweiss@lemmy.world
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        3 days ago

        You left out two important real world aspects from your thought experiment.

        1. one person cares about a specific aspect of the messenger - privacy - and the other doesn’t care, they are just on whatever their peers told them to be on. So if their messenger happens to have the aspect I care about I’ll do it. Since they don’t have any such criteria I expect them to do it as well.

        2. If that person is important enough for me and doesn’t budge I’ll call or E-Mail them. Which is less private than an e2ee messenger, but more private than data harvesting companies.

        • yonder@sh.itjust.works
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          3 days ago

          Exactly this. I use Signal for people close to me and SMS or Email for those who don’t use signal, who I don’t have coversations with often anyways. Dispite it’s many, many flaws, I will use SMS before I use a Meta messenger.

  • countrypunk@slrpnk.net
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    3 days ago

    Most of my communications with friends used to be on Instagram and discord. Discord was easy to get rid of because I kept having issues with notifications on it and told my friends that and eventually they got the message when I just didn’t receive/reply to anything that they sent me.

    Instagram was a lot harder to get rid of. It’s a lot easier to pressure people in person than online. I deleted Instagram and told my friends that they could get in touch with me on signal. Initially they were contacting me on SMS, but I used social pressure with my converted friends to get the others on it by making a group chat on signal and constantly referencing conversations on there. Fear of missing out is a big motivator to get people to switch.

    Another thing that I did was empathize the features of signal over SMS. I talked about things like being able to see when people are typing, read receipts, profile pictures, stickers, etc. Obviously my main motivation is for security, but a lot of people automatically bristle and have the usual “i don’t have anything to hide” talking points so it’s been easier to use those other approaches. With the results of the recent US election it’s been easier to convince people to make the switch, though.

    • Autonomous User@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      It’s libre software. We control it. Always link back to this. Then, you’ll get them off other apps much faster.

  • toastal@lemmy.ml
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    3 days ago

    I use XMPP whenever possible. Requires many fewer resources to run on just about any hardware & I can hand out accounts if needed.

    I don’t care for the centralized or de facto centralized alternatives. I regret along with my uncle convincing family onto Signal several years ago.

    • pineapple@lemmy.ml
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      2 days ago

      Why do you regret convincing your family to use signal? Is it because you wish you got them to use xmpp instead?

      • toastal@lemmy.ml
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        2 days ago

        I would like to lose the Android phone soon. Signal will not work without an Android/iOS primary device.

        But also… Signal requires a phone number for signup where a lot of countries require a passport to get a SIM (unique identifier that is easy to track you). The service is centralized so there is no sort of self-hosting option. There really aren’t alternative clients (not counting mere forks) you can rely on (this helps with the double ratchet encryption of clients with XMPP & Matrix losing keys) unless you go the gateway/bridge route—where the Electron desktop client is pure ass cheeks. Historically they have a big gap in commit history—we can assume there was some sort of CIA/FBI plant. They refuse to use a self-hostable MQTT/XMPP/UnifiedPush option for notifications meaning that the notification data timestamps always flow thru Google & Apple servers. And I am still salty the mobile clients removed SMS support which made it so easy to recommend to family in the first place.

  • Altomes@lemm.ee
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    3 days ago

    My best friends and I switched from WhatsApp to Signal after the period that Facebook agreed not to make changes to WhatsApp went up. Other people were just sheer annoyance

  • azalty@jlai.lu
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    3 days ago

    I’ve tried Signal, Session, Matrix and SimpleX and the most convenient one is Signal. Some will refuse to switch, some, the closest people to you, will agree but probably just for you, unless they see an interest in signal themselves

    For WhatsApp users: I’m saying that they leak all the contacts to Meta/Facebook and use it for advertising and tracking, + sending to the US gov because we all know they share data

    For discord users: they’re a bit known for not deleting things, and backed by Tencent (if I recall correctly) they could have a reason to start using messages for advertising or similar. They’re already using game activity data to push ads (or quests as they’re called). Based in the US so also probably leaks to the gov.

    But most importantantly: I just ask if they’re really to have all their messages, and especially their private messages leaked to the public in case they get hacked. Including all images sent in PMs, and having those analyzed by some other companies as well (often for CP, but still, I’m not really ok with that). Some will say that they’re not, in this case alright, go switch to Signal! Some will say they are okay with it, and tbh they’re probably lying or underestimating the risks and the impact.

    Discord is alright, but please, or all sensitive messages, please switch to an encrypted messenger.