“Oh no! Young people have higher standards and might end up waiting until they’re more mature to start dating! Whatever shall we do?”
Read the first few paragraphs. Everything in there is fairly reasonable. Many of the things on the “ick list” are big red flags that any reasonable person should avoid.
Not sure we read the same paragraph cause pretty much all of these are reasonable.
spits on the ground
disrespectful of other people
can’t cook
lack of interest in self improvement, potential burden
lies about his height
insecure and dishonest
identifies as apolitical
probably a conservative
doesn’t travel enough
misaligned goals/lacking interest in the world around them and in other cultures
weird about other men wearing makeup (“like, K-pop idols”)
insecure/antiquated or traditional gender norms
says he wants a “slightly autistic woman”
rude
has no skincare routine
doesn’t care about their long term health/potentially dirty
likes songs that got famous on TikTok
no personal interests, tastes, or introspection
doesn’t call his parents
this is the only one I don’t really get as there are plenty of reasons not to call one’s parents. I’m guessing they met someone who without a perceived excuse showed they had trouble keeping relationships with those in their life.
sniffs every five seconds
annoying behavior with potential to grow into spite
is an unsuccessful DJ
unwilling to pursue self improvement/unlikely to be able to care for themselves or others
is embarrassed to do karaoke
misaligned interests/insecure
he’s saving himself for marriage
conservative
Most of these seem like something someone they’d met previously did which led to greater issues down the road. They don’t want to deal with it again so they’ve identified some early warning signs to help them navigate in an analytical fashion. Besides, at least this case is operating on a “3 strike basis” so if you have a steady job and just moonlight as a failed DJ you still have a chance.
Neither of us know the background that led to any of these being added to their ick list. I provided reasons why those might be on the list.
When you are seeking a partner it’s completely natural to find someone with shared interests, cleanliness expectations, and socioeconomic and religious backgrounds. That’s all the list is.
And yeah, religion is a personal choice, but if that doesn’t mesh with your partner there’s gonna be trouble and “saving yourself for marriage” is a conservative religious take. Maybe they just wanted to have sex before marriage and the other person was incompatible, or maybe they didn’t want to be in a hierarchical relationship with the expectation that they be submissive to their partners whims and recognized that their partner’s “saving themselves for marriage” was an early indicator of that regressive behavior. Either way it’s an incompatibility that was recognized and added to the list.
“Oh no! Young people have higher standards and might end up waiting until they’re more mature to start dating! Whatever shall we do?”
Read the first few paragraphs. Everything in there is fairly reasonable. Many of the things on the “ick list” are big red flags that any reasonable person should avoid.
So very reasonable…
Did we even read the same opening paragraph?
I can’t believe being a failed DJ made your list of unreasonable red lines.
It’s not? Those are examples listed in the article.
That you are highlighting as unreasonable right? That’s the whole point of that comment. Clearly.
Not sure we read the same paragraph cause pretty much all of these are reasonable.
Most of these seem like something someone they’d met previously did which led to greater issues down the road. They don’t want to deal with it again so they’ve identified some early warning signs to help them navigate in an analytical fashion. Besides, at least this case is operating on a “3 strike basis” so if you have a steady job and just moonlight as a failed DJ you still have a chance.
You are reaching so hard there with those excuses.
Neither of us know the background that led to any of these being added to their ick list. I provided reasons why those might be on the list.
When you are seeking a partner it’s completely natural to find someone with shared interests, cleanliness expectations, and socioeconomic and religious backgrounds. That’s all the list is.
And yeah, religion is a personal choice, but if that doesn’t mesh with your partner there’s gonna be trouble and “saving yourself for marriage” is a conservative religious take. Maybe they just wanted to have sex before marriage and the other person was incompatible, or maybe they didn’t want to be in a hierarchical relationship with the expectation that they be submissive to their partners whims and recognized that their partner’s “saving themselves for marriage” was an early indicator of that regressive behavior. Either way it’s an incompatibility that was recognized and added to the list.