Guilt is there so you don’t hurt the village. Parents use it to get you to give them a break and for you not to cause trouble. But like all feelings, it’s supposed to float on by with maybe a twinge so you don’t do that again and hurt the family/village.

The problem with religions with rules (besides the golden rule, of course) and arbitrators, is that they then decide who and why people get guilt. It’s a manipulation mechanism, even if the religions don’t know it themselves. Most religions know to some extent, with aggressive cults certainly knowing.

The 12 steps has one of the major steps as apologizing to people you’ve hurt for a big reason. Guilt is a trap that you set for yourself if you hold on to it. Apologize to anyone you think you’ve hurt. Start on the small ones, because most probably don’t even remember. If you can’t find the person, apologize to them in your imagination.

I think alcoholism has a strong root in guilt. A lot of us feel guilty if someone dies, even if we never did a thing wrong and the person that died adored us. Again, it helps the village in a social way to have self-reflection when someone dies.

It’s not your fault that you hold on to anything you’ve done wrong. The role of feelings is to float on by. Everyone, and I mean everyone, makes mistakes. Forgive yourself.