I got a bachelors degree in mechanical engineering from a ‘good school’ and yet I never got a good entry level job in the field so I was just wandering the wastelands for a long while before I got a good corporate bullshit job from which I got fired after 3 years and now I have no actual engineering skills and tens of thousand in college debt
I’m 33 and live with my parents and I’m in this constant cycle of living with them until I find a good job in some far away city. They live in a remote place where the only jobs available are 7.50 and yet the living costs are absurd so really, you’re pretty much working just to work. The problem is I can’t move out and do human things such as live by own and have a meaningful because I need a decent salary to survive, and that can only happen if I get something in a far away big city. I don’t want to have to fend for peanuts living paycheck to paycheck(i’ve already tried that a couple of times) in some rathole in a city but I also hate living with my parents so I’m forced in an all or nothing mindset where I need to have a decent salary. I wish I could just take a low wage jobs in some other city but the logistics don’t allow me to.
I feel like I’m rambling, I just feel incredibly stuck, my social life and dating lives are nonexistent and I’m completely fucking broke. I just masturbate all day in my parents house. I have a degree that should be lucrative according to this shitass society, I’m not the archetype of a basement dwelling reddit loser because I do have drive and have moved from place to place and worked and clawed my way through life and stay fit and know how to talk to women and I constantly feel like I shouldn’t be where I’m at but…I kind of am a fucking loser.
Experience shows me that, I guess, this too shall pass and I should land on my feet but god damn I’m regressing constantly and every aspect of my life can’t be moved forward if Instay with my parents in this town. Sorry to rant
Just keep applying to whatever you can find, if you need to leave stuff about yourself off and try to get into one of those horseshit min wage jobs since some money coming in is better than none, especially if your parents are chill that helps you save money. Use chatbots to piece together a bullshit resume and cover letters, its chatbots, unicru personality tests and ATS AI bullshit all the way down to fucking capitalist hell. Play every trick you can to get a job. This is a failing of society rather than any personal one, never was, never will be, every time I see someone in a situation like yours (myself included, exact same scenario a few years older) it should trip that whole shake of injustice, not self deprecation. Survive is the game, it doesn’t look pretty for most on this planet, and especially not in capitalist hellholes.
With all the hexagonal bears having employment issues maybe our own jobhacks sub should be in order.
I agree with the majority of this except the chatbots and AI part. Having just gon through a stack of resumes to choose a candidate I can tell you the ones that were generated by AI stood out and were immediately discarded. So disingenuous I didn’t give them a second thought
Your situation is very similar to one I found myself in after becoming unemployed from the job I had after graduating with a CS degree. We’re close to the same age, also.
I’m still not using my degree, but things have gotten a bit better, I found a job that’s not high paying but it’s stable and I got out into my own place again and got married (also again, a divorce was a big part of what left me on my ass financially too). I’m still hoping to actually get into my field and a higher paying job at some point but I also have contingency plans for if that doesn’t happen, and we’re scraping by for now. I hope it gets better for you as well.
it feels like the only way to get a job now is to go to a staffing adjacency where they pay you less and urge you to work multiple jobs. middle men capitalists on top of middle men capitalists, all the way down
Unfortunate where I live the staffing agencies are super transphobic, they outed me to HR when I got into a factory job and since I’ve legally changed my name etc they made up a deadname based my legal one and misgendered me every 3s. Said agency also misrepresented all experience I did have as factory work. There was obviously no training due to this, quit in like 3 days.
In CA all the positions staffing agencies would offer all required blood draws, nothing like having your blood taken with nothing to show for it but a bruise on your arm and no work.
I really identify with the “have to pass through the eye of a needle to have a life” feeling. Until recently I was jobless for 13 months, just yeeting job applications into the ether. Each day, each application felt like a dice roll with the worst odds in history, and potential employers were the disinterested croupiers blankly watching me try to gamble my way out of limbo.
I did eventually get a winning roll just a couple of weeks ago, and it feels like my adult life is finally starting. It CAN happen. It’s just really hard to feel like anything else can happen until it does.
Like others have said idk if you’re open to advice, but the only universal bit of that I’ve got is to keep trying. It really sucks, and I can’t tell you how many times I broke down in front of my therapist lamenting that fact, but it’s the only thing to do at the end of the day.
For slightly less generic advice, I was able to get some hours on DataAnnotation like others here which helped pay for groceries. Depending on your living setup it could help you build up a little cushion for when you do take that leap into the next part of your life
If you need a fake reference, I’ll tell anybody whatever you want.
I wish I wasn’t the kind of autistic that sucks at lying
similar position here.
I’m 34, no degree, haven’t worked in 8 years (just got approved for Disability this February for mental health reasons, so I get like $1500 per month which conveniently is average monthly rent here).
I never got to experience a dating life, or even have a FWB or anything. And I don’t see how I ever will. It’s so hard to get anywhere or do anything, and at my age nobody will even want to sleep with me unless I “have my shit together”. Like it doesn’t matter who I am, it only matters my future financial prospects and being someone to brag about. Especially on dating sites.
I live with an abusive, emotionally unstable grandparent that I dream of being able to move away from, but rent prices are just too fucking high and I don’t know anyone else in this stupid world who could help me.
I’m just so fucking depressed about my dating life prospects. I recently met a girl on some dating site who is also on Disability for mental health reasons (nice to know she also wouldn’t judge me for it). We were talking every day for like 4 months, but she suddenly started soft-ghosting me and I don’t know why. Probably nothing this good will ever happen to me again – and it was barely even anything. I’m in good shape but obviously no car + no job + on disablity pay + live at home => nobody will ever want me, not even just for a FWB/no commitment type of thing
Don’t be so hard on yourself, keep putting yourself out there you may still find someone, it won’t be Hollywood or conventional, but it will be something.
One day I’m going to do the everyone is wanted post, but it probably should be a badpost since how…off I realize it sounds typed or said outloud.
Don’t be so hard on yourself, keep putting yourself out there you may still find someone, it won’t be Hollywood or conventional, but it will be something.
I don’t see how. I’ve been using dating sites for years and that was the closest thing to a thing I ever had, and even this one fizzled out.
where am I going to find a woman who doesn’t think no car + no job + living at home in my 30’s is a deal-breaker?
yes, the golden age of “dating apps” is long over. They are monetized to hell and back now. Most of the profiles are bots or scammers. The “real” ones are typically not great people. I’m not sure what your disability entails, but public spaces are where you will find genuine people.
If you absolutely insist on using dating apps, try Hinge.
