I’m imagining it like this:
Made by Illumination.
Chris Pratt as Calvin
Dwayne Johnson as Hobbes.
Zendaya as Susie.
Calvin and Hobbes is like the only media from my childhood that hasn’t been licensed away and slopped beyond recognition. And where the creator hasn’t later become a reactionary asshole or outed as a sex offender. Please leave it alone.
Pretty sure Gary Larson is cool, I hope. Far Side and Calvin and Hobbes were my faves growing up
Oh yeah, pretty much everyone who liked one liked the other as well. I wouldn’t even read any of the other strips.
he will have to lock the IP rights away in some kind of irrevocable trust or else that stuff is eventually getting monetized (and even then)
You’re being too kind to yourselves imagining Chris Pratt as Calvin or Hobbes.
No.
He’s gonna play the dad.
They’ll get a stranger things kid to play Calvin. Yes they’re all thirty now. No they don’t care.
deleted by creator
OP made some improvements to the phrasing
It’s based on the bumper stickers, not the comics
There would undoubtedly be a peeing Calvin joke in the movie.
He pees on both a ford and a Chevy…but Hobbes drops a big dump on BYD and then they high five.
Charlie Day as Calvin
Danny Devito as Hobbes
Glenn Howerton as the dad
Rob Mac as the mom
Oh you said the worst not the best
Jared Leto as Calvin
Daniel Day Lewis method acts Hobbes
Margot Robbie as Susie.michael bay spaceman spiff movie
BRB going to market “Spaceman Spliffs” at the dispensary
but it’s calvin
Jack Black as Hobbes
Timothy Chalamet as Calvin
Sydney Sweeney as Susie
Plot: Calvin has a bad day. He goes home to play with Hobbes, who tearfully waxes on about how he misses his home and family. Calvin gets Susie to go on an adventure where they find Hobbes’s home world, which is full of other wacky tigers. Ultimately Calvin decides to say goodbye to Hobbes and leave him there as some misguided and terrible metaphor for growing up. Susie and Calvin kiss at the end.
If it makes enough money there will be a ride at Universal Studios. You’ll ride in a Hobbes mobile and stare at 90% screens after waiting for an hour and a half.
Noah Schnapp is a 20 something Thomas Hobbes studying abroad in France and uncovers a secret John Calvin manuscript with passages narrated by Stellan Skarsgård that would fundamentally alter the Reformation Movement and Calvinism, and bring to light the plot to murder Calvin but make it look like illness, and point to where he was buried with secret Templar treasure.
This would be shot on a green screen with CGI France and surplus costumes and props from a History channel production.
Horrible in the opposite direction:
The Amusements of the Tiger, directed by Wes Anderson
Owen Wilson as Calvin
Woody Allen as Hobbes
Elizabeth Banks as Susie
The New York Times gives it five stars, 20% audience rating on Rotten Tomatoes
nope, I’m not raging at a shitpost today. nice try
Bill Watterson died?
He didn’t. This is a hypothetical.
Don’t fuckin scare me like that
Next time preface it with the word IF. Which means on condition of.
I can’t see any news saying so
a Cameo by a minion has been foretold by prophecy
Jared Leto is Hobbesmicrofiche already suggested LetoGal Gadot is Susie
😵
Jack Black as Hobbes
